Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize
