yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
