Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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