Whats the glycemic index on semen?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Slut skills are useful in every country.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
