who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
