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gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
