So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Randomize
