So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize