THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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