You just made me feel so damn special
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
