Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
