I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
