i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
