My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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