I think I just saw someone hide a body.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize