trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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