Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Randomize
