you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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