I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
