your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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