I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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