how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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