how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
