you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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