I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
