I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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