can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
