Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
