I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
