She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize