They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
