i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
