Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
