shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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