help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
