went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
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