so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
