THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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