Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
