I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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