I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
My ass is underappreciated
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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