Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Please don't give away my fajitas
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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