I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
