The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize