Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Randomize
