1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
