your parents love me but you hate me
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
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