Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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