Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
