i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
